Pour Some Sugar on Me...

...just make sure none of it gets into my mouth...at least not for the next 6 weeks, because it's Nutritional Challenge time at Guerrilla Fitness, bitches!

I've been fully gluten-free since Thanksgiving, and have been tinkering with a Paleo"ish" type of diet since starting CrossFit in May. My few previous attempts at a strict Paleo challenge were flops. I bailed as soon as I caught sight of a sexy, ice-cold glass of milk or a big, thick, long, and juicy - corn on the cob (mind out of the gutter, you whores).

Generally, I am happy with the little dietary lifestyle changes that I have been able to incorporate while experimenting with Paleo, however, I'm really interested to see if I can break some of my more deep-rooted food addictions as a result of this group challenge.

I'm a sucker for sugary condiments. I'm bad at eating the proper amounts of protein. I have naughty dreams about dairy, where I gorge myself on an endless supply of whole milk that flows from marble fountains, and falls from the sky like delicious drops of teat-flavored rain...I FUCKING LOVE MILK! Listen, I don't judge your fantasies.

In order to tackle this challenge, I had to do a ton of pre-planning, I ravaged through Paleo cook books to choose my meals for all 6 weeks. I stalked some of my favorite Paleo aficionados on the old interweb for tips and tricks. I put together meal plans, shopping lists, and cheat sheets. I decided like with most things in my life, it was time to go apeshit or go home, however, Day 1 is in full swing, I'm sick as a dog, and already, visions of white potatoes dripping in maple syrup are dancing through my head. It's obvious that I need to drink some more water - and lay off the Food Channel until the challenge is over.

So wish me luck, as I expect the food hallucinations will continue until my sugar withdrawal has run its course,,,

Do You Remember the Time?

Remember when I said that once we came back from vacation I would be back to updating the blog regularly?  Well...I lied.  I'm prone to do that.  Long, drawn-out, and dramatic story short - we came home from France and work got NUTS.  I got sick, and then I got hit by a fucking biker.  I'm serious. 
[No, it wasn't a motorcyle - it was a cyclist.  No, it wasn't a bike messenger, it was a Doctor...on a bicycle...cycling at break-neck speed, straight into my precious face.  No, he didn't leave the scene.  He stayed, but he was virtually useless.  Yes, it hurt like a mother fucker - see image below.] 

YUCK.  Anyway.  THEN...I got sick again.  Then Thanksgiving came.  Then I had to go on a two week business trip.  Then Christmas crept up on me, and BOOM - it was 2012, and here we are.  I'm panting even as I write this.

In so many ways, CrossFit has made my life immeasurably better, and for the past couple of months, life has only repaid me by getting in the way of CrossFit!  Sometimes, life is an asshole (feel free to put that on a t-shirt if it moves you). 

The sporadic time off put me back to square one in a couple of areas which is humbling and absofuckinglutely maddening at the same time.  My pull-ups were getting strong before the hiatus, and if you were following, you know that I got down to a lower resistance band.  Well, take any credit you gave my fat ass back, because I'm back on the big old granny band for now.  And while I'm emotionally abusing myself...I may as well tell you that the lovely toe push-ups that I was cranking out pre-trauma (few as they were) are as extinct as dinosaurs.  In fact, not only did I lose push-ups on my toes, but I now look like sizzling bacon while performing knee push-ups.  FAIL! 

In better news, my lifts are getting heavier, my cleans are getting a little less wonky, and I've been able to Rx weight a few times (just the weight, not a full WOD).  My endurance is getting better little by little.  I didn't eat like a TOTAL moron during the holidays.  I went completely gluten-free the day after Thanksgiving, and started eating clean again with the new year.  I technically haven't lost a pound since I started in May, but I have lost two sizes and have gained a shitload of strength, energy, confidence, and friends (puuuuuuke).

My resolution for 2012 is simply to get better...at everything...CrossFit and non-CrossFit related.  In the hopes that I also get better at blogging, I'll let you know how that resolution pans out :).